I have so much to say sometimes. I need to start writing songs. If anything it's a way to get my voice out. Being un-heard in the world is a shame.

Summer.

It's summer. A time for everything to be perfect. It never really is. I guess in the winter you get sad and blame it on the weather but when summer comes around and those blue skies show once more you still have all the same old problems you started out with. But Atleast you cant complain about the weather...much (Heat). Summertime as a kid was the best thing in the entire world. Wake up with no worries, no thoughts. What happens to that purity in your heart? I couldn't even guess if I tried. I suppose I should go to sleep. was just listening to music and had a spark of nostalgia looking through some pictures I took today. Hope you catch a glimpse of your purity in this picture. Nothing but a smile on your face the entire summer. Nothing but love.

notablogatall.

so when people get old do they just talk about unjuries and medical stuff? seems like it. God help me if I ever get so lonely for conversation that the only thing i can think of is injuries to talk about. I had a wonderful last week or so. The Oregon country fair and then camping up at fairview...well I suppose you cant really call it camping because the inside is so nice. We did get dirty/tired and sometimes angry at one another so it was pretty much camping. looking ahead my friends party is on august first. Dunno if I want to lug around a camera while hanging out with friends...seems strange and distracting. They do have about 5 live bands playing so I DONT KNOWWWWW. fuck I need sleep. showering only adds about 30 min onto my staying up time. Iv been looking at large format film cameras lately. I love the spookyness of some of the images from them. 1800's images. maybe maybe maybe. my birthday is in less than a month. wow I haven't even thought about it because everyones broke and Im not really expecting anything. I pretty much got nothing I asked for last year anyway. fuck im going to sleep before I start depressing myself how people in this family don't really know me very well. night!

every morning has a specialness about it. It really makes me feel that fairy tales are real and anything is possible. I can reach out my hand and have flowers growing from my fingertips. A daint smile in my eyes as I cherish all that surrounds me. I am at peace for one moment. I only wish I could share it with someone.

Chaos can help unwanted change. Sometimes you NEED it.